ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
