i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
