Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
