just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
