You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
