Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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