I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
