Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
