He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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