I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
