Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
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