The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
foreskin is a definite game changer
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
A+ Viking dick
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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