Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
