I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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