You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
