Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
