coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Iām not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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