p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Randomize
