i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
We are all done wearing pants today
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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