Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
