first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
