I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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