yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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