I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
