now i know why i became what i already was.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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