Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
