She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
fuck your aforementioned shoe
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
pray to the hookup gods
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
