Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
