Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
