Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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