I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
