Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
