school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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