That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Randomize
