**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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