why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
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