My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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