He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
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