The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
