it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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