I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
