what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
