wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize