You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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