The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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