I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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