Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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