You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Randomize
