Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
