Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize